Have you ever felt like the harder you try to achieve something, the further away it seems to get? Like the universe itself is conspiring against your every effort? Well, you’re not alone. This frustrating phenomenon is captured by the intriguing concept known as the Backward Law.

The Backward Law, popularized by philosopher Alan Watts, suggests that our relentless pursuit of happiness, love, or success can actually backfire. It’s a counterintuitive idea: shouldn’t striving with all our might be the key to achievement? The Law proposes the opposite – that a more relaxed, even detached approach, might be the secret sauce.

Imagine the classic “pink elephant” thought experiment. The more you try to force the thought of a pink elephant out of your head, the more persistent it becomes. The Backward Law applies this idea to our desires. The tighter we cling to a specific outcome, the more we create resistance, hindering its natural unfolding.

Here’s how the Backward Law can be applied in different aspects of life:

• Love: Obsessively searching for “the one” can make genuine connections feel forced. Focusing on personal growth and building fulfilling relationships can ironically attract love in unexpected ways.
• Success: Chasing a specific job title or salary can lead to burnout and a sense of inadequacy. Focusing on mastering your skills and enjoying the journey can open doors to unforeseen opportunities.
• Happiness: The constant pressure to “be happy” can make us more aware of our unhappiness. Embracing life’s full spectrum of emotions, including sadness and frustration, can lead to a more balanced and authentic happiness.

The Backward Law isn’t about giving up on your goals. It’s about letting go of the need to control the outcome. By focusing on the present moment, enjoying the process, and trusting that things will unfold as they should, you might just find yourself getting what you desire – almost effortlessly.

So, the next time you find yourself white-knuckling your way towards a goal, take a deep breath, loosen your grip, and see where the Backward Law might take you. You might be surprised by the results.